Late night thoughts.

I know I’ve been stressing a lot lately about what turn my life is going to take,what can I do or rather what should I be doing now to at the least improve my chances of making it big when tomorrow comes. Little did i know that puting this kind of expectations on myself as early as now was doing nothing but fucking with my state of mind,every minute ,every second i spent worrying about whether I’m wasting time i should not be wasting was taking more from me that it should be, causing me more harm than i should let it. Little did i know that stressing wasn’t good for myself health wise, emotionally and even physically,yess i looked a mess,been sleeping all day,maybe depressed or just confused,i really don’t know for sure.
Then reality hits me in the form of questions running through my mind.
Questions about if I’m really ready for the next chapter of my life? What does making it big even mean for me? , I’m already looking for relevant jobs, I’m i really ready to start taking care of myself, paying my own bills etc?, I’m i ready to wake up extra early just so i get to work in time? Do i even have the skills needed for the jobs i deem”relevant”? Those were just but a few,and surprisingly,the answer to most of these questions were,no i am not,those i answered yes,well they felt nothing close to a straight up,bold yes.
And so i decided to let myself be in this moment,let myself relax and let God work things out the best way he sees fit. Let my expectations wait and leave some room for disappointments. I am still young to put this kind of pressure myself, and doing so is not helping me,i choose to take a step at a time,a day at a time,untill that day it all comes to be. In the mean time, i choose to enjoy this time i have now,discover shit about myself,prepare myself for the next phase of my life. I choose to entertain positive thoughts. During this time,i choose to let things work themselves out. I choose to BREATHE . I choose to believe in my ability to relaaaaaaxxxx.
I got this🧘.


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